BG News Food Blog

The hardest part of my day is facing myself in the mirror and coming to terms with my freshman 15 (and my sophomore 20 and my junior 25). 

Considering the horrific things going on in our world, I guess this little dilemma doesn't rank too high on the things-that-are-actually-important list. But similar to the way Main Street gets a little hazy when you're looking at it Saturday night through your beer goggles, my bedroom mirror seems to become the fun house mirror from hell any time my self-esteem is low and my pity-party-tolerance is high.

At times such as these, most would probably suggest I suck it up, wipe the snot off from under my pathetically dripping nose and make a trip down to the ol' Rec Center. 

My vegan friend advocates less processed foods; my meat-eating friend has been known to offer me a bite of the half-eaten burger in his book bag. I've tried everything from adding more fiber to using less carbs, drinking more water to eating less sugar. One time I tried to eat only fruit and protein shakes (and an entire bag of colored marshmallows when my roommate wasn't looking).

At this point I bet you think I'm going to give you a recipe for a healthy, and probably meal-plan-friendly, easy-peasy meal. Instead, let me introduce you to my new favorite guilty pleasure: deep-fried avocados. 

1 cup of beer

2 cups of flour

A pinch of garlic powder

A pinch of salt

A pinch of pepper

Vegetable oil (enough to get about 1/4 inch up the side of a pan)

2 avocados

Start by pouring your oil into a pan and heating it over medium-high heat. Mix together the beer, flour, garlic powder, salt and pepper. This is the most important time to make sure the taste is right. Once you like the taste, judge the consistency of the batter. If it's too runny, add more flour. If it's too gloppy, add more beer. In the end, you should have a batter that is thick enough to grip the avocado without becoming too heavy on the slices. Let this stand while you peel the avocados and cut each into six wedges. 

In general, the colder the avocado, the easier it will stay together during this whole process. Also, the cooler temps help the batter stick the best. You'll know your oil is ready to go when a splash of water dances on the surface.

Dredge each piece of avocado in the batter, shake off any excess and drop into the oil. These things cook up really fast, so keep a watchful eye on the level of brownness you've got going on. Flip each avocado once before fishing it out with a slotted spoon or a pair of tongs.

I'd suggest allowing each deep-fried gift from God to drain off a bit of that oil onto a piece of paper towel or recycled brown grocery bag. That way, you can tell your reflection in the mirror that it's not as bad for you as it seems.